A Treatyse on the Care and Husbandry of the Sheepguana
based on Extensive Correspondence with Respected Natural Philosophers as well as the Personal Experience of the Author
offering the Aspiring Flock Guardian much Practical Advice to the Benefit of Bird and Beast in Combination with Anecdotes for the Entertainment & Education of Readers both Young and Old
by Harold Effington Splittswadding
Chair of Unnatural History, Eastguard University
The McGill dimetrogoat
One of the stranger breeds of this strange species of livestock is the McGill dimetrogoat. While it was first bred in the north-western coastal plains, small flocks can now be found in many places all across the continent. A typical meat-breed adapted to flat temperate regions, the McGill has a stocky body with relatively short…
The Coveed sheepguana of the Quartin plains
There are many creatures in the world we birds look down on, who nonetheless possess impressive abilities. Bats hunt by echolocation, bees can navigate by the sun even on overcast days and some naturalists tell us that carnivorous plants may be able to count. One animal with a peculiar gift is the Coveed sheepguana which,…
The Holland sheepguana of the rainforests
Although all sheepguana are descended from domesticated sheep, there are numerous populations living in the wild. While some of these feral populations have remained similar or even identical to the captive flocks they descended from, such as the Guire sheepguana we discussed previously, others have changed considerably and exhibit traits typical for today’s sheep’s undomesticated…
The Yétorb sheepguana of the Uneedy plains
While most breeds of sheepguana retain a high degree of independence, the Yétorb is perhaps unique in that it is utterly reliant on frequent and intensive assistance from the flock’s guardian. Living on the lush meadows of the Uneedy plains, the breeder who created the Yétorb had intended to produce an animal optimized for meat…
Shear Terror: The Kingfisher sheepguana
The Kingfisher is one of the breeds in which the sheepguana’s magically influenced origin is most apparent. During the day it is mostly a solid, no nonsense breed, a reliable producer of high quality wool, milk and meat. Its fluffy fleece can be spun and dyed into excellent yarn of all colours and its eggs…
Nr. 47: Toxoplasmosis fentonii
From Chapter 7: 101 Sheepguana Diseases with Many Detailed Illustrations that are Invaluable for the Guardian but May Not be suited for the Casual Reader of a Delicate Disposition As the educated reader may know, there is a set of particularly vile diseases in various animals in which a parasitic fungus or other microscopic villain…
The Khaw sheepguana of the Quongols
If you listen to the bardic teaching songs, they’ll tell you that whenever one devises a rule of thumb for civilisations, one must count the Quongols as an exception. While serious scholars will of course take a more differentiated view than can be portrayed in songs meant for fledglings, it is undeniably true that they…
The Hurley sheepguana of the merfolk
Fig. 1: Adult Eweguana, crawling on land Fig. 2: Adult Ramguana, basking Fig. 3: Lambguana, being groomed by Azurina eupalama Fig. 4: Skull Fig. 5: Right rear foot, showing webbing The nigh infinite adaptability of the sheepguana to almost any conceivable surroundings is second only to the good natured cheerfulness with which they endure them.…
The Guire sheepguana of the western forests
Fig. 1: Adult Eweguana Fig. 2: Adult Ramguana Fig. 3: Eweguana Skull; from Shrine of Matriarchs past; colour of ribbon denotes flock Fig. 4: Lambguana The next subspecies we shall discuss are the Guire sheepguana that live in and around the forests of the western kingdoms. Their wool is tough and tends to form a…
The genesis of sheepguana
Like all the best things on the internet, sheepguana was born of a combination of good-natured trolling and people mixing and remixing ideas as they inspire each other. If you’d like a short summary, watch this video from sarahwithtea’s livestream. For a slightly longer version with links to the original tweets (links on the images…
Sheepguana facts 